One year later, after a full day of clients and a Christmas party, I sat on my couch depressed and missing the “one who got away” . It really frustrated the hell out of me. I had come such a long way in my personal and spiritual journey that I was completely confounded by why this was still haunting me.
A year prior, I had broken up with someone I had been waiting for years to be with, and in the break up, I burned the bridges to any reconciliation. The evidence I had compiled about why she really wasn’t a good fit for me was unloaded onto my friends and spiritual advisors. When I had some time to myself, a realization came over me that I never accepted the way things were. The mistake was made, and I tried like hell, like the hero trying to overcome gargantuan odds, to win her back. It was obvious that I had watched too many movies, and that it was over.
That night sitting on my couch, I had a revelation: I didn’t want to accept that reality. The hopeless romantic in me still wanted to have the impossible happen even after all this time. I was resisting what my life was now, and that’s where the pain was able to grow. Then another revelation popped up: why would I want that which didn’t work? I deserved more than that. The relationship that I really had been wanting all this time was yet to come, and it was going to be so much better than anything I had experienced before.
The context that I was in only gave me two possibilities. It was either a yes or a no. Well, I didn’t like those odds! As it would have it, God, the Universe or whatever you want to call it floated another biggie through my noggin: If you accept what it is right now, you make room for what is to come next. Well, duh! In my infinite wisdom, I was holding onto that soggy sandwich when I was being offered a fresh-from-the-deli hoagie. The possibilities that context created were infinite. I am completely loved by God. He is just waiting to give me what’s next, what I needed and what I had always wanted. I only had to accept what my situation was now and be grateful for what I had the opportunity to experience. It made me so happy to realize that I just had to let go, and expect the unexpected.
I went to sleep that night excited to know that anything is possible for me. When I accept the way things are now, not resist it anymore and walk out that door in the morning each day everything I ever wanted will manifest in my life exactly when and how it is supposed to come into being. My job is to stay out of the way of it and put one foot in front of the other trusting that everything will be ok.