Being happy is not hard. I thought it was hard, and I did my best to made to make it hard. I imagined that if I were to be happy I would have to have tons of money, excitement & a lavish lifestyle, or on the flip side, I would have to sit on a mountain top in a meditative state trying to reach Enlightenment.
During work hours, I would run myself to the ground trying to make it to the next level and get more money, which in turn, would buy more happiness. It….didn’t work, and the result, frustration and exhaustion. I have nothing against money. I like money. It pays bills. When it stops being a tool, and I start knocking over little, old ladies to get it, it may be a problem. I got nowhere with this strategy. I didn’t get anywhere trying to become a spiritual giant either. Man, was I happy when I did a swan dive and smacked right into the ground (figuratively, or else I wouldn’t be able to write this blog). It afforded me the opportunity to shed my old way of thinking, and I learned a few basic things.
- There is nothing to fix!
Again, there is nothing to fix! I am ok the way I am. I am not broken, I’m not the worst person ever and my life is not falling apart. My head would like to say that all is wrong with the world, and it would have me believe that. However, I stopped looking at my life as problematic, and I started seeing “problems” as opportunities for growth. Growth is good. I did a whole lot of it as a child, and now I can reach the cookie jar.
2. Give it away, give it away, give it away now!
It’s so easy to make sure I get that last slice of pizza before you do because if I don’t, I’ll go hungry, be homeless, the world will end, etc….. I wasted a lot of energy looking out for Number 1, but I didn’t get much back in return. When I make someone laugh, hold the door open for them or help them move into their new place I have felt actual joy. That feeling of joy when I have given of myself to someone lasts a whole lot longer than that last slice of pepperoni. It makes them feel good too. Win, win 🙂
3. Put the bat down.
I am human. You are human (or at least, we hope so). I will make mistakes and screw up. So what should I do? I used to love to beat myself up over doing something wrong. There was almost a sick sense of pleasure in it. When I decided to put the bat down and learn from my mistake, my life was more content and had less drama in it.
4. Who you talkin’ bout?
I don’t know about you, but I’m my favorite subject. I just believed that everyone else was thinking about me too. It was nice to be wrong. I stopped caring so much what people thought of me, which gave me a chance to stop being who I thought you wanted me to be, discover who I really was and see that the people who love me like that person too. Accepting other people for their uniqueness brought more beauty to the world I saw. Hey, you’re cool the way you are too!
5. Be good to myself.
This was the hardest thing to do for a lot of reasons. Whether I believed I didn’t deserve it, I didn’t earn it, or whatever the excuse de jour was I struggled with this practice. PERFECTLY FINE. I didn’t walk out of the gym the first day in shape, I had to keep going back. In fact, I left with sore muscles and a feeling like I wanted to vomit. I kept showing up, and now, the exercises are like 2nd nature. Being good to myself was the same way. The rewards out measured the initial pain. I love me.
I hope that this brought some light into your life. I will always be here for you world.
Peace and love — Mike E.